Wow, God is so crazy flippin' good! As tired as I am right now, I need to give Him some major kudos/props/snaps/praise/glory etc before I hit the sack.

We're going to fast forward since Sunday starting right now:

Sunday: Discipleship. Sharing. Awesome dinner prepared by the wonderful Impact group gentlemen. Sunday night meeting. Worship on the beach.

Monday: Extended quiet time. More sharing. Sunshine on the beach. Massive amounts of sand in my shorts. First official Bible study. Awesome. Dairy King and mint chocolate chip ice cream in a waffle cone. Amish dice.

Tuesday: Pick up birth certificate from Post Office (praise Jesus it's safe!). Do paperwork at work. Still need Social Security Card. SERIOUSLY?! Sit at Social Security Office in Conway, SC. Order new card. Make little smokies and mac 'n' cheese. Set off fire alarm repeatedly. Again, SERIOUSLY?! More sharing. Spirit's conviction to pray for green shirt Stephen and Ben. Dairy King the Sequel: Same Order, Different Day.

Wednesday: Orientation at 9. Orientation over at 9:50. Meet supervisor. Discover I bought the wrong kind of khaki shorts. Of course. Go shopping. Buy running shoes. Figure out that 5 Guys burgers have two patties. Yuck. Kinkos it up. Dinner with Alissa and Biggest Loser. Which brings us to.........

DATE NIGHT WITH JESUS, AKA THE BEST THING EVER.

Seriously. Best. Thing. Ever.

I just changed positions on the couch, so you know this is legit.

Where do I even start? (Welcome to my brain, everyone. This is how it works. Or doesn't work, depending on how you look at it.)

Every Wednesday, we have 2-2.5 hours blocked out in the evening that are devoted to "Reflection Time," or "Date Night with Jesus." This is a chance for all of us to separately have an extended quiet time in whatever fashion we decide. I was mildly looking forward to it all day. I'd be lying if I said I was totally stoked, but I guess I knew that God wanted to do something tonight. So at first I had a really hard time focusing. I turned some music on and began to worship all by myself in the apartment. Corporate worship has always been my easiest "access point" to God, if you will. It's been a long, long time since I worshipped all alone. Originally I had planned on going to the beach since nature is my other big connection to God, but it was raining like nobody's business. Anyway, I started trying to worship, and when I realized I could sing however I wanted, it got easier. (So that's what it means to not think about what others think of you...hmmm...) I still struggled with focus, but was trying really hard to stick with it.

If you're scrolling/skimming, this is where it gets really cool:

So as I'm struggling with focus, Marvelous Light by Charlie Hall comes on. And I just felt this push to get up and dance. Ahhhh hahaha I cannot dance. I can car dance. And I'll make a fool of myself in crowds, but I can't just dance. But I stood up anyway, and started walking around really awkwardly. Oh, I'm sure I was a sight to see...but then Mr. Charlie Hall and I got to this line:

Sin has lost its power

Death has lost its sting

From the grave You've risen

Victoriously!

And suddenly, I was the greatest dancer EVER. I was fist pumping like nobody's business and jumping and twirling and I'm positive I looked like a crazy person, but I was experiencing freedom in a way I have not in a long, long time.

After my time of musical worship, I tried to pray. And I immediately lost focus. Again. But something happened, and I just began to talk to God out loud and really casually. No big words, no formal languages, no trying to limit the amount of times I say the word "just," simply talking to Him like I'd talk to Kathy over breakfast in the AMU. And it was GREAT. Suddenly I didn't want to stop talking to Him. After lots of time in prayer, and a couple chapters out of 1 Corinthians, I read a piece by Bill Bright that really did some work in me, and I wanted to share a segment (emphasis is added by me).

Suppose, when my two sons were young, they had greeted me with these words: "Daddy, we love you and have decided that we will do any thing you want us to do from now on as long as we live." What do you think would have been my attitude?

If I had responded to their expression of trust in me as many believe God will respond when they surrender their lives to Him, I would have taken my sons by the shoulders, shaken them, glared at them sternly and said, "I have just been waiting for this. I am going to make you regret this decision for as long as you live. I am going to take all the fun out of your lives, give away your toys, and make you do all the things you do not like to do."

Many people believe that this is the way God will respond when they say, "Lord, I surrender the control of my life to You." They do not understand how much God loves them. Do you know what I would do if my sons came to me with such a greeting? I would put my arms around them and say, "I love you, too, and I deeply appreciate this expression of your love for me. It is the greatest gift which you could give me and I want to do everything in my power to merit your love and trust."

Isn't that awesome?! And yet tragic at the same time? I looked at that first reaction that the father could have towards his sons, and I can see that I am often times guilty of believing that that is how God would speak to me or treat me. But the Gospel is so clear that the response of God is actually more like the second one. He loves us (and loved us first), and He is delighted in our living sacrifice. He wants us. He wants to honor us and protect us. He has so many great things for us, and yet we treat Him like He is the cosmic meanie. That could not be farther from the truth! Instead He desires us even in our brokenness, our sinfulness, our terrible condition. He has picked us, and He is waiting for our response.

Please consider this passage some more. What implications does it have for us? What response are we expecting from God? So many cool things to think about...

The following quote from GK Chesterson was laid on my heart in the process of this whole night:

Let your religion become less of a theory and more of a love affair.

It has become so easy for me to talk about God, and sometimes harder for me to talk to God. I think tonight really served as an opportunity to invest in the love affair of a relationship with Christ instead of building on my theory of Christianity. They can be so starkly different.

Anyway, God is moving. Bottom line. I am so thankful for the breakthroughs He is delivering, and the work He is doing.

Prayer requests:

Starting work tomorrow!

Cami/Israel and the riots and increasing violence

Ben (kid shared with on the beach)

Stephen (same as Ben)

My dead heart now is beating

My deepest stains now clean

Your breath fills up my lungs

Now I'm free, now I'm free!